WikiPeter There is no single person here on this planet that is in a position to judge anyone else

Dating Deal Breakers.

I've been meaning to write this entry for AGES, and i'm taking lots of inspiration from a post that Melburnian created a long time ago.

Liz Lemon: My Life Coach

Bad Kissing.
I'm mad for a good pash; nothing gets me in your pocket (or bed) faster than a really good passionate make out session. Just take some of the pointers down while you're here and if we ever meet, you'll be sure to win big. Don't bite my lip in an attempt to be passionate; actually that's incorrect, I fucking love that just don't bite too hard as it fucking hurts and I will knee you in the balls. Avoid trying to suck my tongue into your mouth and rip it from my body.

Fuckwitry.
I LOVE being an idiot sometimes; there is nothing more freeing than letting go of your inhibitions and being that person we all love to hate. Be it too loud, too drunk, or dancing with uncontrollable arms & legs while you recreate the Elaine dancing scenes from Seinfeld at the one & only gay bar in your city; simultaneously cutting any chance you had of getting that cute guys number. The point is, I like to have fun and be an idiot, you should too and so should you friends. I want tears of laughter streaming down faces.

Conversation.
Conversation should just flow. Nothing is more painful than a date being more like a job interview. If I have to ask every single question I'm going to get very annoyed very quickly. I've been on some horrible dates, truly painful experiences.

At least offer to pay, you cheap assholes.
I've been on a few dates with guys who don't even offer to share the cost, or on one occasion they didn't even join the party in buying a round. I'm not loaded. I don't expect anything in return; Just don't expect it all the time.

Commander Keen.
Because i'm socially retarded to a certain point and fail badly at meeting new homosexual people in a social setting; the majority (see: all) of my homosexual #DisasterLoveTour prospects begin from the internet (Grindr, Manhunt, Scruff). If you send me the same message multiple times before I've had a chance to reply, or constantly ask to meet; than im sorry your are out of the game. I'm not fucking logged in to those all the time like some people; I actually pretend to have a life. The amount of people I've blocked on those things for sending me four or more message in a 30 min window is beyond my comprehension.

Be All and End All.
Look; chances are we might not hit it off and that's most likely because I'm a bit picky. If you can't see past sex or spending the rest of the our lives together then we're probably not going to go any further than the initial dates. I can be friends with people who I've made out with, just be weird about it.

Be Social.
I've dated a couple of people in the past few years and nothing slightly irritated me more than their unwillingness to social with my friendship circle. It's not a huge thing, but its nice to be able to socialize together in a situation that isn't just one-sided. I make the effort to get to know your friends and it would be nice if you did the same. I've had two many awkward "oh, where's [insert name here] moments to last me a lifetime.

Ch Ch Ch Changes.
Don't try and make me something i'm not. I like to dress daggy most of the time. I'll wear the same Bonds Raglan or V-Neck Crew t-shirts everywhere I can & I like to add my dodgy stencils to them; so just deal with it. I'm probably never going to be that pretty guy. I'm practically a cast member of the inbetweeners.

Snap Happy.
I'm not one thats huge on photos, so it would be nice if you were. I don't have many photos of past relationships so it would be nice to start a collection. Drag me out of my comfort zone and you'll be rewarded with drunk and outrageously loud Pete.